Hi all, I hope you are all doing well. I just want to reach out and say that the disease is telling me some lies lately. I'm countering with everything I learn to be true in recovery, especially the grave nature of my illness.
I'm recognizing a life of seeking security - in food, in jobs, in money, men....the list could go on but if you are reading this, you probably get the gist. :) All of my efforts to obtain guaranteed security have ended in the only way that they can - in a small and diminished life. Yesterday I heard a speaker say that seeking security only serves to prevent the resovoir of joy from being filled up so that when difficulties arise, and they always do, I can't handle them because I don't have any reserve, life looks to mean and hard. As Chuck C. says in A New Pair of Glasses: "I've got to outthink, out-perform, and out-manuever in order to eke out a miserable living out of an unfriendly universe."
So I'm grateful to be where I am today, in the bosom of a 12 Step fellowship where I really belong, where I can uncover, discover and discard the things that stand between me and God and me and you. I'm so grateful to be learning that the universe is not an unfriendly place and that I have access to and infinite supply of pwer in my Higher Power.
Harry
Hi all,
I hope you are all doing well. I just want to reach out and say that the disease is telling me some lies lately. I'm countering with everything I learn to be true in recovery, especially the grave nature of my illness.
I'm recognizing a life of seeking security - in food, in jobs, in money, men....the list could go on but if you are reading this, you probably get the gist. :) All of my efforts to obtain guaranteed security have ended in the only way that they can - in a small and diminished life. Yesterday I heard a speaker say that seeking security only serves to prevent the resovoir of joy from being filled up so that when difficulties arise, and they always do, I can't handle them because I don't have any reserve, life looks to mean and hard. As Chuck C. says in A New Pair of Glasses: "I've got to outthink, out-perform, and out-manuever in order to eke out a miserable living out of an unfriendly universe."
So I'm grateful to be where I am today, in the bosom of a 12 Step fellowship where I really belong, where I can uncover, discover and discard the things that stand between me and God and me and you. I'm so grateful to be learning that the universe is not an unfriendly place and that I have access to and infinite supply of pwer in my Higher Power.
Thanks to all of you who support me.
Love,
Kasey